You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
