I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
