I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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