If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
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