oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
