Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
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