Having a random hookup so left but love u
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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