Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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