Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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