If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Congratulations! We have a period
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
