Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
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You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
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