there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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