BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
