Why are handjobs necessary in class?
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
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