like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
