Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
