I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
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