Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
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