that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
