Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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