Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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