the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I'm like, not good at living.
Randomize
