U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
