real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I see more hoeing in ur future
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