Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
he laminated a picture of his dick.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
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