he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
There was a lot of him and a little penis
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Randomize
