I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
