I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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