I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
40s are totally the cure
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
