A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Randomize
