hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
