The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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