I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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