Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Randomize