yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
