Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
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