I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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