just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Randomize
