we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize