Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize