should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
