i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
