I didn't shave. On purpose
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize