Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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