shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
