I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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