Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize