Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Can Purell be used as lube?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
