Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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