I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
