i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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